Rants and Whimsy

The Mayfairy Blog Awards

January 4, 2016


My favourite part of blogging is all the lovely people I’ve met. I’ve made so many more beautiful friends again in 2015. In 2014 I celebrated this by creating my Calendar of Bloggers.  I still love these people but I’ve made the editorial decision that if you were on last year’s list you can’t be on this year’s. To celebrate my new 2015 batch of hotties I’ve decided upon The Mayfairy Blog Awards. These most prestigious awards are given out by me, on a whim, to honour those who have achieved the the greatest levels of “stuff that makes me smile”.

Side note: anyone else seriously love “Bang on the Door” when they were a teenager? I was having a nostalgic moment during my time off, so that explains these illustrations. I’ve not just lost my mind. Having said that, I’m sorry if you never loved Bang on the Door and you hate my doodle.


The Blogger Who Should Definitely Have My Babies
WINNER: Katie from Bloody Hell Brennan
Basically, she makes me laugh, she says the stuff we’re all thinking but think we probably shouldn’t say out loud and she gets me on a level I didn’t realise I even had. Think how fabulous a “Bloody Hell Mayfairy” baby would be. Sure, we’d have to set fire to the earth about 20 minutes after its arrival because total universal destruction would be imminent, but how glorious would those 20 minutes be?



The Blogger Who Pioneered “Sarcasm Chic” Style
WINNER: Emma from Emma Inks
Do you ever have the feeling that there is a cool chick deep inside you that’s just dying to get out? Well I have a suspicion that my inner cool chick is something like Emma with all the hard rock and colourful hair, except my inner cool girl is never gonna get out because I’m too busy falling over in public and trying not to have a mental breakdown. So inner cool chicky just has to read Emma’s blog and dream . By read I obviously mean obsessively stalk on the internet.



The Blogger Who Wins The Champion Chatter Trophy
WINNER: Connie from Connie Consumes
Hahahaha, that time we tried to have dinner in an hour and three and a half hours later we were the last ones in the restaurant? That time she approached a stranger we were curious about and talked to him for a solid 15 minutes only to come away with no information about him because she probably did all the talking? The fact that we’re still not done with the conversation about the twatty ex newspaper editor who brought us together who we never actually met because there’s apparently so much to say on the subject?! The best conversations are Connieversations.



The Blogger With Magical, Mischievous Hair
WINNER: Emma from Adventures Of A London Kiwi
You think you know a person, you think, “hey, that’s Emma, she has nice hair. It’s about yay length and… –” then you glance over the table and Emma’s just sitting there like frigging Pocahontas-Rapunzel-Disney-Goddess, tresses a-gleaming and tumbling down all over the place looking all pretty and you realise that the secrets of the universe are probably hidden in that mane. You just came for brunch but nope, you’re dealing with some top secret intergalactic beauty now. She’s just magic that girl.



The Blogger Who’s Gonna Remember Me When She’s Famous
WINNER: Angie from Silverspoon London
I am not the only person to sit at my computer and wonder, “What the fuck is Angie’s life about and how do I get me some of that?” She’s a bloody blogging unicorn who waggles her magic wand at things and they all turn to glitter. Angie be like “I’m going to master photography and have everyone in Blogdom love me and send me cupcakes” and POOF! All of a sudden her photos are gleaming and she’s sitting on a mountain of baked goods in a tropical paradise. She’s got follow through out the wazoo. As opposed to me being like “maybe I should learn to cook properly” 15 minutes later: frozen pizza. Or “maybe I should set up a blog schedule” 15 minutes later: too drunk to write. Or “maybe I should be nicer to people” 15 minutes later: Googling how to remove blood stains. Bloody Angie making me look bad.



The Blogger Fully Committed to Hedonism
WINNER: Leanne from Broke in the Big Smoke
Leanne would have you believe she’s a nice, sensible Scottish lass. She writes about finances and paying off debt and all that prudent and rational stuff. But did you know she chooses the blog events she attends based off of who is offering her the best food options? That she makes friends on the night bus and they call her the next day because she’s so wild and fabulous and everyone needs more of that in their lives? That if you can’t find her after the food’s finished at a blogging event chances are it’s coz she’s getting her flirt on? She flits around the world and makes it look like fun just happens to her accidentally. I don’t know quite how she does it but one time I ate her cake because FRANKIE DESERVES FUN TOO.



The Blogger Who Has Her Shit Together
WINNER: Erin from Island Bell
Every photo this girl takes involves a perfect manicure. Sometimes even a perfect pedicure. There is no chipping. I repeat, no chipping. There is even glitter usage at times. Nothing makes it clearer to the world at large that a girl has her shit sorted and it not a sobbing wreck at weekends than perfect nail polish. If you can keep your nail polish pretty for longer than 30 seconds (the time it takes for me to smear it all over a door just outside of my flat that I hardly ever use) then you have my attention, my adoration and envious sighs aimed in your general direction.



The Blogger Who Makes Wednesdays Worthwhile
WINNER: Gianni from Across The Hog’s Back
Gianni writes about writing on a Wednesday and it really tickles my noodles. Seriously, we all do it so we should all be interested in writing but hardly anyone mentions it. When I first started poking around Gianni’s patch on Internet street I realised she was super smart. Then she told me she’s writing a novel. That’s when my love really took it up a notch and turned into OMG YOU HAVE TO BE MY FRIEND AND LET ME BASK IN YOUR GLORIOUSNESS because we all know that smartness is contagious and I’ve totally gone up ten smart points just reading Writing Wednesdays on the regular.



The Blogger With True Dedication To Penis Hats
WINNER: Katy from Little Miss Katy
There are times when I just prattle on about shit and people usually just give me shifty eyes and carry on with their private conversations and try to exclude me for their own sanity’s sake, but not Katy. Nope, Katy joined in the fun and now we have a mutual love of dressing up penises in hats. I’m not even 100 percent sure of how we got there, to be honest. I should probably mention that it’s not something we do together, per se, but we tweet about it. Penises need hats. They make the world a better place.



The Blogger Who Needs To Go Into Lens Manufacture
WINNER:  Suze from Luxury Columnist
I don’t mean that she’s the telescope girl in the John Lewis Christmas ad. I have her down more as a designer sunglasses kind of purveyor. Basically, I want to see the world like Suze sees it. With brightly saturated colours, ponies running about all over the show and doors with big googly eyes on them. She needs to invent glasses that let us see that world for ourselves.  A glass of champagne in one hand a stunning pair of “Suze Shades” on my face is the look I need for Summer 2016. Until then I’ll be on her Instagram page, saying “oooooh” and occasionally “ahhhhh”.

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