I’m back. After finishing up with all my IT drama and moving my files back to where they should be, I took some time to catch up on all the work that had fallen by the wayside during the every-computer-in-the-house-meltdown. Then my iPhone felt a little left out of the whole palaver and died. So I had to erase that and reinstall everything, thus losing all my photos (nothing too drastic, I barely use my phone camera) and phone numbers and what have you.
It’s been a month of resurrection. Right now I’m giving my iPad the side eye with a smattering of COME AT ME BITCH. It’s the only thing that hasn’t tried any funny business.
Anyway, taking all this time away from blogging has given me a chance to clear my mind and have a proper think about blogging. There’s not much else you can do while waiting for your life to reboot without proper access to What’s App.
So many bloggers write about anxiety, about blogger guilt, about looking at your follower numbers and stats and feeling that they don’t match up to where you think you should be by now. I mean hell, you’ve probably been doing this for a year, or maybe even five. You should be due an easy life and a puppy by now. The easy life would be ruined by the puppy being a rambunctious twit, but at least it would be cute and you wouldn’t ever have to do anything soulless again. Except that’s just not how life works.
Why do we give ourselves such anxiety over events and posts and clicks? Why do we care so much?
I think there’s this expectation of success that comes with blogging. I also think it’s subtly enforced when we tell non-bloggers about our new hobby. For most, the only connection they have with this idea is tales of teenage girls in their bedrooms writing about make up and filming videos and now they’re famous multi-million pound brands in their own right.
Heck, if a bunch of teenage girls can make a career out of it, why can’t you? It’s almost like it’s a foregone conclusion that if you just work hard enough, you will be Zoella, or The Londoner – or whoever it is you idolise – before year’s end. Now, I’m not saying you definitely won’t be. It’s entirely possible. I am saying that it’s no longer 2010 and while mega success is still doable you’re probably not going to get it by following the exact same route that those girls followed. The stakes are higher now. Competition is denser. Whole industries have sprung up around blogging and learning to blog and it’s all *SERIOUS BUSINESS*.
It’s funny because for most people this is basically a hobby. Yet I still see the hobby bloggers getting caught up in the stress of it all. Again, I’m not saying “don’t have a dream”, just throwing it out there that if you started a new hobby doing cross stitch you probably wouldn’t feel pressured to make it your career. You feasibly could make it your career – people do buy cross stitch books and patterns that you could design, you could sell your work as art pieces, etc, but there’s not a pack of cross stitchers with mega fame and empires making everyone else feel inadequate.
Maybe there’s more room for movement with other hobbies. If you sense that everyone around you knows and accepts the premise that if you work hard enough you’ll be a famous blogger with a fabulous career, if those things don’t happen to you it’s almost like you’ve failed, you’ve been lazy, you’re not doing it properly and have been wasting precious time.
In a way it makes it worse that that we all get that little taste of success. A product to review, a blogger meet up with free food and drinks. Why would we get that if we weren’t fabulous? And if someone gives me a night out that must be worth about £100 per head, if I work just a little bit harder I’ll surely get a reward that’s even bigger next month. This starts off super fun with lots of new friends, but before you know it: PRESSURE!
There are a lot of bloggers now and on one hand that is good because it means we’ve got this rocking community vibe. We can all make new friends and still avoid that person we want to avoid because there are so many of us.
But on the other hand, it means that your content has to be next level good if you want to stand out. Brands are organising events, which is fun, but if everyone is blogging the same content, you are not special.
I saw someone complaining on social media the other day that their videos and content were just as good as Zoella’s, but they don’t get the same opportunities and exposure as her and isn’t it just terribly unfair. I don’t really know this person, they looked young. Even if they were completely correct and their content was just as good, there’s no point in being just as good as your idol. You have to be better. Or if you can’t be better, you have to be different. Bring something new to the table.
I repeat, it’s not 2010 anymore. If your lack of blogging “superstar success” is getting you down, think: what is special about your blog? Why would anyone choose to view your content over <insert famous blogger here>? They have a history with <famous blogger>. They know they can rely on them for a certain kind of content. What motive do they have to switch to your content?
Alternatively, you could be like me, say, “fuck it” and decide to run free in the wind doing my own thing because my weirdo posts make me far happier than my review posts. I’m not even sure which category of (my) posts get the most clicks and I’m not going to look.
I don’t really have the definitive answer to stalling blogger guilt. I just don’t want to feel anxious about not chasing a carrot I haphazardly stumbled into following in the first place. I am not that donkey.