Attempts at Vanity

What’s in my (old) bag?

March 17, 2015
The-Mayfairy-Bag-Header

One of my old bags. I even have matching shoes. Not even joking.

 

Ok, so this is pretty much a dietary staple of the blogging world. The good old “what’s in my bag” post. I’ve never actually written one before, because what’s in my bag is basically just shite and lipgloss. It wouldn’t be very interesting or groundbreaking. However, the other day I was searching through all sorts of old handbags that I don’t really use anymore but I can’t bear to part with. I was on the lookout for another, smaller handbag that I thought would match my outfit and might be inside one of bigger ones. It wasn’t.

Nonetheless, I did find a whole heap of other stuff that I had forgotten I owned. You know how it is, you get into a handbag rut. That one bag that pretty much goes with everything has all your necessaries in it, so you end up just grabbing it everyday. If you try and switch it up too often you rush and the result is you standing outside in the rain because you left the office keys in the other bag. So it’s best only to risk it on special occasions.

Whenever I buy a new bag I tend to just grab the bare essentials out of the old one and start a whole new ecosystem in the new one. Ergo, I now have a bit of a purse graveyard in my closet, complete with peeling PVC and fleeting glances of Frankies past. Here we go then, here’s a collection of stuff I used to carry around with me every single day, until something shinier came along and and I abandoned it. It’s pretty much all still shite and lipgloss, but it’s what’s in my (old) bag!

The-Mayfairy-Bag-Art-Deco-Mints

1. Art Deco Mints
I don’t smoke. I don’t eat piles of onions and then go on massive kissing binges with lots of new and exciting partners. So why did I need mints? Because I’m a sucker for anything in an art deco case and this is just so damned classy.

 

The-Mayfairy-Bag-Royal-Lip-Balms

2. British Lip Balms
Ok, so there is an overwhelming amount of lip balm and gloss in my old bags. I am unable to finish a product; instead I just move onto the next one. A lot of this gunk needs to be thrown out pronto. But these wee guys are special. I’m assuming I bought them at some kind of Royal Palace Gift Shop. They are the cutest lip balms I’ve ever owned, and I’ve barely even brushed them against my lips because they’re really just for looking at. I’m a little bit happy they’re back in my life.

 

The-Mayfairy-Bag-Marilyn-Monroe-Card-Holder

3. Marilyn Monroe Card Case
Don’t want to keep your bank cards in a wallet? Need somewhere to store those business cards? How about this Marilyn Monroe themed card holder? Because nothing says business like Marilyn. I went through a bit of a Marilyn obsession in my teens and back then all my financial decisions went via Ms Monroe; it still has an old bank card in it.

 

The-Mayfairy-Bag-Stick-On-Nails

4. Fake nails
Surely I was given these as a freebie, or a gift. If I had paid for them I would have had an occasion in mind to use them. But these fakies just sat abandoned in my purse for years. Why haven’t I used them? What the hell Frankie? They’re not nice enough to save for a special occasion. Most of the time I can never be bothered with painting my nails properly, and apparently I can’t even be bothered to stick them on either. Screw it, I’m going to use them and blog about them.

 

The-Mayfairy-Bag-AddressBook-Cards

5. Dinosaurs from a bygone era
Cards, cards and more cards! Video store cards. Loyalty cards for stores in countries I don’t live in. Library cards for libraries in cities I don’t live in. An Egyptian themed address book filled with people I worked with part time when I was 16. It’s amazing to think we once thought we needed this stuff. Most hilariously, there are a collection of my old student IDs, from high school through to the graphic design student years. The print quality of these cards is really something. They clearly only had 17 colours available to them and from this they had to create some sort of dot pattern that could recreate faces well enough to be used for identification purposes. They did well. Ahem. Also, where the hell are my eyebrows?

Frankie 16

16 year old Frankie has dyed her hair black and is considering a career in axe murder.

17 year old Frankie has puppy fat. In her cheeks.

17 year old Frankie has puppy fat. In her cheeks.

18 year old Frankie is sick of your shit. Hurry up and take the damn photo.

18 year old Frankie is sick of your shit. Hurry up and take the damn photo.

19 year old Frankie has accidentally burnt off half of her hair in an unfortunate 'watching TV whilst blow drying' incident

19 year old Frankie has accidentally burnt off half of her hair in an unfortunate ‘watching TV whilst blow drying’ incident

Starting to look vaguely human! 20 year old Frankie has discovered the fake smile.

Starting to look vaguely human! 20 year old Frankie has discovered the fake smile.

Stuff that’s in every single bag:
Pens, tampons/pads and lip products. Every single bag has an alarming assortment of these three things. I can only assume that it’s my survival kit for life. As long as I know I’m able to write, menstruate or hydrate my lips with ease I’m sure I can handle anything else that comes my way. Who knew?!

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