Rants and Whimsy

The Ten Levels of Blogger Guilt

October 21, 2015

*Warning, following post may contain YELLING*

LEVEL 1

I posted yesterday. I don’t need to post today, look at all those big successful bloggers who only post every second day, I can be like them

LEVEL 2

I need to write a post for tomorrow. But I also want to drink. I’ll drink now and write in the morning, everyone wins…

LEVEL 3

Why did I drink? I forgot to do the big important thing and that other thing and email that person….
*15 seconds before jumping in the shower*
OMIGOD THAT BLOG POST I FORGOT TO WRITE IS JUDGING ME.

LEVEL 4

Trying to write a blog post in 15 minutes.
Failing.

LEVEL 5

I’ll just post it later in the day, when I have time to finish it. I know very well I have no time to finish it BUT MAYBE I CAN DO IT WHILE DOING SOMETHING ELSE. Multitasking for the win!

LEVEL 6

OMIGOD THIS POST HAS NO PHOTOGRAPHS. I am the worst blogger in the world.

LEVEL 7

I’m destroying everything I’ve worked for. I’ll never get contacted by any PR companies ever again, people will stop visiting my blog, I’ll never get any comments on any of my future posts just because of this one lapse of judgement and drinking. I’m going to have to start from scratch, that’s all there is to it.

LEVEL 8

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? You don’t blog for the approval of PR companies. Why do you care about getting validation from other people? That’s not why you started this. You didn’t start a blog just to please other people. Wait… why did you start a blog? Was it to write things like this? OH GOD MY BLOG HAS NO DIRECTION

LEVEL 9

Calm down. It’s going to be ok. Today can just be about social media instead. WHAT DO YOU MEAN EVERYONE WAS NORMAL ON THE TRAIN TODAY AND I HAVE NOTHING TO TWEET ABOUT? People are unfollowing me, I can feel it.

LEVEL 10

PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER YOU STUPID COW. You have 100 posts in drafts. Just pull out one of those. Or put together a listicle. Oh, but they all require photography and retouching or ten hours of illustrative work or actually making the time to do the thing and report on the thing… whadaya mean it’s midday?

WHERE ARE YOU, GIN O’CLOCK? I NEED YOU.

There, you can all take your fingers out of your ears now. The blogger angst is over.

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